Monday, August 9, 2010

I got a machinehead...better than the rest

You know that feeling when you go away on a vacation for trip somewhere and upon your return home everything feels so different? That feeling like you have been gone a lifetime and everything changed, everything went on without you. Your entire existence is really belittled as you realize your personal ‘world’ and within that, your local area and the people within it likely noticed the weather more than your presence or lack thereof.

Ya, that feeling.

I love that feeling, it breaks down that ego and really reminds you of the humility one should flaunt (ironically) day to day. I was fortunate enough to have this feeling this Saturday after returning from a shopping trip to New York State.

I haven’t had that feeling in a long time, sometimes it is nice, sometimes it is melancholy.

So, schedule update, I have all my courses now except for APS301, I am waitlisted for that, but I have been informed that I am awaiting Registrar’s approval, as it is a core course and I definitely should be in it. Not to mention, I am overcharged several hundred dollars…but that is a battle for Wednesday… not looking forward to that.

I started this with the intention of complaining about two of my friends in particular and their currently lifestyles. In a period of self-reflection I really don’t believe anything I say or write here will change a thing between me and them. In my mind the story and details have been told a million times, and some days it don’t come easy, some days it don’t come at all. In the end, certain people will choose to escape reality via weed or liquor. The escape is more important than their relationships.

Telling someone like them to stop, or cut back is like trying to put out a fire with gasoline.

Why would I want to see someone who would choose a plant over me?

Reminds me of a Green Day song:

Boxed up
All of her favorite things
Sold the rest at a rainy yard sale
Big plans and leaving friends and
A westbound sign
Weighed out
Her choices on a scale
Prevailing nothing made sense
Just transportation and a
Blank decision...

She's taking off
Taking off...
Taking off...
Taking off...

No time and no copping out
She's burning daylight and petrol
Blacked out the rearview mirror
Heading westward on
Strung out
On confusion road
And ten minute nervous breakdowns
Xanex a beer for thought
And she determined...

She's taking off
Taking off...
Taking off...
Taking off...

Is it salvation?
Or an escape from discontent?
Will she find her name
In the California cement?
Punched out of the grind
That punched her one too many times...
Is tragedy 2000 miles away?

She's taking off
Taking off...
Taking off...
Taking off...

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