Cold and dark like the other side of the bed

Uneventful day...

For the exception of the fact people never really surprise me. Nay, they do, never for the better. I'll explain. Today was another instance of CME-Lab-induced-rage, understandable to say the least as the explanations are invisible ghettos of privellege and grief. Today was different, by some miracle a TA came into 1066 lab room and left the answer sheet on the table and peaced out. Needless to say copying ensued hard fast. So in walks your narrator, David E. King, upon inspection of the situation I make the sensible and quite frankl fair recommendation that instead of everyone copying this, everyone(members of room 1066) copying one person who had finished it so I may take this sheet room 1068, or whatever room I was in.

Makes sense right? Seems fair right? Everyone wins right? Fuck no. Greed. The same people who I've had class with for the last what? 6 months...they showed their true colours. Now don't read this and assume all 1T3 of Civ is a bunch of assholes, just those ones...on that day. They let me down, and they let everyone in the other lab group down and sold us out for nothing.

Now I'm a man who was raised to put others before himself for the most part. Put the mission first as I would have said a few years ago. Clearly others don't see it that way. To make a long story short. If something is too good to be true. It ain't.

Put up a solid hundy on my shoulders today with the big man Chris. Man oh man am I sore now or what. That and the weather were really the only redeeming quality of the day.

Aside: I've got an outlook on life I'd like to share, when someone writes on your wall/or adds you on fb/etc, it's kinda falttering, you know what it means, it means they were thinking of you. That's a nice thought.

I'm your man.

You ain't got to explain shit, I've been robbing motherfuckers since the slave ships...

...with the same clip and the same four-five. Two point-blank mother fucker's sure to die.

Nay, I'm actually not feeling that gangster today...feeling fatigued. Hard fatigued. In fact, after this post I'm gonna sleep. Note: it's 9:00 pm, I feel like I am back in grade school. Anyways...

For those of you who do read this, more specifically you know who you are...I would just like to thank you. I know I come off as arrogant/self-absorbed/(fill in the blank) alot, but something about someone actually taking the time to read my musings, it's very flattering, beyond flattering. In alot of ways I think you know me better than I know you and well I'd like to change that if I could.

I digress, such a beautiful day and night...I almost feel guilty knowing it is feb and I wasted this chance to have a good run and a bike ride due to fatigue. Oh well, what can you do right?

What's really been bothering me is a certain someone from first year. You see them almost everyday and you grow close. Things happen and you tell them how you feel. They don't reciprocate. A year passes and they are a ghost, then all of a sudden they are back in your life, hard and fast, and the way the act...the vibe they put off, the body language they use...what is going on, what happened?

Do you want something to happen?
How do you feel?
Why are you back?


I'm not tightrope walking, so then what? I'm walking without your hand.
I'm not blindfolded, so I'm walking without your eyes.
Why now?


That probably isn't all I have to say about that.

She's looking at you? oh no no no, she's looking at me...

I'm feeling mighty fucking gangster today. Destroyed all my midterms before reading week, pretty sure I destroyed the programming one last night. Mighty gangster.

But...I say to you what every warrior has known since the beginning of time, nothing is as it seems. Man I am so lonely, it's the little things, like when I send someone a text, I just really want them to reply...and when they don't it breaks my heart, and know this, it can take my life, but it can never take my urge to try.

Believe in me. Help me believe in anything. I want to be someone who believes.

I heard you on my wireless back in 52...

Lying awake intent at tuning in on you.
If I was young it didn't stop you coming through.


They took the credit for your second symphony.
Rewritten by machine and new technology,
and now I understand the problems you can see.


I met your children
What did you tell them?

Video killed the radio star.
Video killed the radio star.
Pictures came and broke your heart.


And now we meet in an abandoned studio.
We hear the playback and it seems so long ago.
And you remember the jingles used to go.

You were the first one.
You were the last one.

Video killed the radio star.
Video killed the radio star.
In my mind and in my car, we can't rewind we've gone to far

Video killed the radio star.
Video killed the radio star.

In my mind and in my car, we can't rewind we've gone to far.
Pictures came and broke your heart, put the blame on VTR

Sure this is an 80's gem, and trivia note it was the first song played on MTV EVER. Remember when MTV played music? Fuck man, I do...Anyways, I feel it's message applies as much today as it did then. Obviously you replace video with the internet and radio with well, everything?

Now I am not complaining that much, but just 3 years ago when i was in highschool, no one had cellphones, we didn't Facebook so much, I dunno...we were just so different. We would just call people. I compare that with today, and wow I just don't know. I am not opposed so much as I am just able to relate with this song.

I have long had this discussion with my friends. Why is it that the youth today look so much older than us that is to say, take a group of similar sized/class/dressed/etc males and compare them with me and my friends and they will often look older than us. What is it...

Why is this? What causes this? I don't know, no one has an explanation. I'm not a Doctor. Anyways I digress, my point was that much like the 80's, much like anytime I suppose one could say, we live in an age of constant change...where the fuck am I going with this...I'll be honest, I began writing this at like 8 pm, its not 2 am...this is pointless, and off topic. Oh well, I guess I can

put all the blame on VCR

And sometimes Y

int i, j='A'+32;
printf("%c", j);
for (i=1; i<5; i++) {
j += 4 + i/3*2;
printf("%c", j);
}
printf("\n");

If you get it, hats off. I actually got this one.

Grandma take me home...

Life needs more Sliver.

Got an interview for a job today, a job I REALLY want...I hope it goes well, it would be a good opportunity for me.

Anyways, Sliver...he looks so...he looks so Kurt in that video. I can't really watch their music videos too often, I always feel like it was all a lie. He gave us so much and then he just took it all away. To me sometimes, it feels like he cheated us, cheated us out of who knows how many more years of great music. The one transgression I can never forgive Kurt for.

But, hurting hearts don't care. Me of all people understands this. At the end of the day I understand what he did, and I know I am not too far off somedays...at least it feels like that.

...Woke up in my mother's arms.
Grandma take me home.
I wanna be alone.

That light is reflected now, reflected from afar.

Together, but miles apart (maybe 140 miles?)
Every inch between us becomes light years now

It don't seem fair.